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Previous poster (a noncustodial father) recently granted temporary orders for 50/50 parenting schedule; how to make it final?

Your Question:

I agree with that other Stepmom--you do rock. Your advice has been most helpful in helping my husband and I be part of his childrens' life.

The latest in his case is that there was a hearing in which the judge took a look at the Coordinator's report. She asked BM why she objected to the recommendation of 50/50 time share. BM claimed that overnights on a school night would be damaging to the kids' education. The Coordinator, teachers, etc. thought otherwise. The judge ordered a 50/50 schedule until the Final Contested Hearing, which is coming right up. Our lawyer and the Coordinator said it would be a good idea to request a continuance so the new schedule would be in place longer and give the kids time to adjust. They are happy and doing great, BTW.

I guess there is a question in here somewhere...what, if anything, can we do to make sure this new 50/50 schedule becomes final? If we don't get a continuance, we have the hearing in about 3 weeks.

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My Answer:

Thanks for writing again. Great to hear that the kids are adjusting well to the new arrangment.

Lest any readers not fully realize what you and your husband have accomplished, he's a Dad who faced and defeated false accusations that the mother still contends are true. He's had only every other weekend and two brief weekday periods with his children for a long time.

At this time, I think you guys are pretty much done; regardless of continuance or not.

If you're going before the same judge, the guy seems like he's already made up his mind. If he had any concerns about the 50/50 schedule, he could have erred on the side of caution and simply not made any changes unil the trial. Think about it... judges don't want to jerk kids around with changing schedules all the time.

Sure, a continuance could help cement the current situation. But too, it gives the mother more time to build her case to fight it. You and your husband should be walking on eggshells until trial because the mother is now really itching to get new dirt.

As I've said in the past, just keep doing what you guys are doing. It's having a positive impact on your situation. Stick with your attorney and continue to follow his advice. Don't change any approach with your parenting coordinator.

Don't freak out if the continuance isn't granted-- it could be the judge just wants to dispose of this case and has already largely made up his mind, barring any new evidence.

Your husband is accomplishing something that hardly any noncustodial parent can accomplish, once assigned to the standard every-other-weekend schedule. Clearly, you have a strong case that 50/50 would be far better for the kids than the prior arrangement.

I emphasize on this website that attorneys give better advice than me, particularly when the attorney is producing results. So, if your attorney disagrees with anything I write, ignore me. Your attorney is showing himself to be extremely competent (in combination with the very helpful Coordinator's recommendation), and I don't want to mess it up for you.


This website gives common sense advice that is not intended to act as legal guidance nor psychological guidance. The author is neither an attorney nor licensed psychologist. For specific legal guidance or specific psychological guidance, consult with a licensed professional.

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