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Father with sole custody wonders what to tell young son about the court terminating mother's parental rights

Your Question:
i am currently involved with the courts on a neglect cause with my son. his mother just had papers served to her for terminateing her parental rights and i am not sure on how to tell our son that his mom can no longer see him nor can he see her. she lost him to the courts for neglect and now i have full custody of him. he is only 5 and so far he is ok with just living with dad. this has been going on for 16 months now and come next month October, her rights will be terminated. thanks a blessed father

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My Answer:

Kudos to you for being the responsible parent and leading the charge on raising your son.

Kids are pretty resilient. If he's doing okay, I don't think you should be worrying about much. If he were to show some regression in toileting, bed wetting, or other developmental milestones, that may indicate some anxieties he's got going on.

But if he's got consistency and routine from day to day with adults that love him and to whom he's bonded, that's the best you can do. Look around to see what women can provide a nurturing female bond-- your sister? Your mother?

If it seems like he's struggling, then consult with a child psychologist. At some point he may ask you why his mom isn't around, and you can just tell him that mommy just had a really tough time being a good parent... but he still has you and all of your family to give him plenty of love.

I'm not a psychologist. But that's how I'd approach it.


This website gives common sense advice that is not intended to act as legal guidance nor psychological guidance. The author is neither an attorney nor licensed psychologist. For specific legal guidance or specific psychological guidance, consult with a licensed professional.

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