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Is noncustodial father's online sexual exploits relevant to child custody?

Your Question:
Does a fathers personal sexual online experiences interfer with child's wellbeing when he has personal listed trying to find sex and inviting women into his home. Personal states attractive man with nice house. Be ready to be punished and must be discreet and if you are the one my jacuzzi will be ready when real fun begins. I saw this several time and he would not give this up to keep our relationship so I am very worried about what or how far he will go with this type of behavior and worried about what can or will happen with bringning strangers into home for sex possibly when child is present. Father also deceitful, indecissive, changes mind almost everyday and tries to control every situation.

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My Answer:

Thanks for writing again.

I would ask you back to describe to me how a parent's online sexual exploits have a negative impact on an infant.

If you can come up with a cohesive and rational answer as to how that has an impact on an individual's abilities to be a good parent, then you have a relevant argument.

But if your primary focus is the morality of it - despite it being perfectly legal - then it is largely irrelevant to your custody matter.

It's important for you to understand that the court won't care about your character assessment of your ex unless it has direct bearing on his parenting abilities.

Think about that many people are deceitful, indecisive, and controlling. In fact, I think you may have described many politicians we see on TV daily. However, you don't see the court yanking their kids away from them, do you?

As much as a bastard as your ex may be, you really need to reel in your arguments to ONLY relevant matters with regard to parenting. If he's deceitful, show how that deceit has harmed the child. If he's engaged in online sex, show that it's at the expense of caring for the child and the child was neglected and harmed. Tie everything to the child's welfare.


This website gives common sense advice that is not intended to act as legal guidance nor psychological guidance. The author is neither an attorney nor licensed psychologist. For specific legal guidance or specific psychological guidance, consult with a licensed professional.

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