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Mother wants to terminate an uninvolved father's parental rights but also wants to maintain child support

Your Question:
My daughters father left state when she was 3yrs old and i haven't heard from him since. i get support and have partial custody through court. He told them he would come and get her every other weekend and he's never came or called us. Is there a way to still get support from him but him not be able to see her? Isn't there a thing called abandament? It's in her best interest that he doesn't come back in her life now. It's been 2yrs since there he left and never has he tried to contact us. I want him out of our lives but still pay for her. Is there a way?

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My Answer:

Thanks for writing.

Sure, if everything you say is true, the father abandoned his child.

You're asking if there's a way to ensure that you never have to deal with him again, but you want him to pay child support for the next 13 years.

You can always write to Santa with such a wish, but real life just doesn't work like that. Sorry.

If you want to terminate his parental rights, it'll be because he is exceedingly dangerous to the child or there is another man willing to adopt your daughter. In either scenario, you would need to go before a judge; and the father will have an opportunity to make his case for not having his parental rights terminated.

When a parent's rights are terminated, that parent's obligation to the child is completely done. That means if you get your wish and never have to deal with him again... the child support disappears at the same time.

Finally, if/when the father decides to be a father, the court will nearly always find it in a child's best interest to have both parents involved to some degree. This is even if the parent disappeared for a while. Granted, a parent who disappears for a while won't have much court-ordered time with the child until that parent proves to a judge (over time) that there has been a big change, but a family law judge will give a parent every last chance to show responsibility for being a parent.

Good luck.


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