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Never married father wants to know what to do after mother suddenly decides to ignore the mediation agreement after two years

Your Question:
My ex and I who we never married had a bad break up to were she ended up stabbing me, and was prosicuted for. we have a 6 year old daughter incommon, and i do all that i can for her. After the break up i took her to a mediation, we had papers drawn up for visitation. Later we were cooperating and had the medation dismissed under the fact that we could cooperate by the guidlines of the medation agreement. 2 years later she all of a sudden says she changed her mind about the agreement and that it is going to be her way from this point on. I am a good father and will go to the ends of the earth for my child. I am not in a financial position to retain a lawer and do not know what to do or how to go about it. if you have any helpful advise that could lead me in the right direction would be greatly appreciated.

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My Answer:

Thanks for writing.

If you have any way to raise money or go in debt to retain an attorney, I would strongly recommend it. Though you have a pretty straight-forward case, you want it handled expeditiously and correctly.

I would suggest that you take that mediation agreement in its entirety and file a paternity action in your local courthouse that handles family law. If you don't know, call the information desk at the nearest courthouse in your county and ask where one would file family law actions.

In your papers, you would outline exactly what you wrote to me... that you've been following this for two years, and you now want court orders for it to continue due to the mother's sudden change of mind and refusal to cooperate in co-parenting your daughter. It wouldn't hurt to mention that the mother once stabbed you and was convicted of a crime.

Unless something major has happened recently that you haven't disclosed, and unless you're an addict, alcoholic, or violent offender; I believe you stand a good chance to get the mediation agreement made into court orders.

If you truly can't find any way to afford an attorney, once you locate the family law section of your county's courthouse(s), ask if they have a help desk. They can help with paperwork and filing.

Finally, get someone to proofread your affadavit/declaration that you'll provide the court with your papers. That's the written document wherein you swear under oath that the story you're outlining is true. You don't have the best grammar or spelling (you and a majority of adults, so don't sweat it), but it'd only benefit you if someone can edit any errors in your affadavit before you submit it to the court.

Good luck.


This website gives common sense advice that is not intended to act as legal guidance nor psychological guidance. The author is neither an attorney nor licensed psychologist. For specific legal guidance or specific psychological guidance, consult with a licensed professional.

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